Why Is My Reflection Someone I Dont Know??

Tonight was rainy and wind blowing strong..
But its still a beautiful night for me...
While im listening to my MP3..
When i press the ''NEXT'' button..
Suddenly,my favourite song ''Reflection'' is played...
Sometimes...
I dont ever know...
Who actually is me...
Then.....
I take this ''black diary''
And start to writing....
I write the lyric on my diary

................................................................................................................................

Look at me
I will never pass for a perfect bride, or a perfect daughter
Can it be im not ment to play this part
Now i see that if i were truely to be myself
I would break my familys heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me..
Why is my reflection someone i dont know
Some how i can not hide
Who i am, though i've tried
When will my reflection show who i am inside
When will my reflection show who i am inside 


................................................................................................................................


The feeling who never knew our real self...
Its really suffer..
But i know that if i truly be myself..
I will hurt everyone's heart...
I cant hide who i am..
Sometimes i think that i dont have to be real myself...
Because i dont want to hurt anyone more...
I dont know..
What should i said or write now..
Everything make me cant thinking well..
Only thinking who am i...
Should i return to my old self..
Or be the other person to make other people happy??
The only thing i know...
I have kill my old self..
Because im afraid to the past which always haunted me...
When my reflection show..
Who i am inside..??

Run To The Secret Garden...

11:05 pm
In this windy night..
I saw the time on my laptop screen..
Tonight is really cold..
Usually cold will make my heart feel so calm...
But tonight it never help me to vanish away my feeling..
My tears cant ever fall down..
I just saw the black diary on my bed...
But i never feel want to write it...
So i just sit alone..
Watching the stars that never come up..
But i hope that i want to lay on the snow field...
Its hurting me a lot...
But its ok..
I try to pretend nothing happend..
I know this day will come..
I try to smile..
But in the end its make my heart bcome more bleeding...
Its ok..
I will continue run to the secret garden that i try to reach..
After everything is done..
I will run to the secret garden..
When i reach to that place..
I want to sleep forever..
Without everyone try to reach it...
Sleep with a pain that cant i cant vanish away...
I still believe that if i look the right way...
I will find out that the whole world is a garden...